Jizz Gets His Come Up Ance
Jizz Gets His Come-Up-Ance
Arc: None
Summary: Azran intimidates Jack Colson, hilarity ensues.
Date: 2659.256
Related Logs: None
Participants: Azran, Silence, Seelig

At the bar, 'Jizz' Colson is watching and cheering at the tv screen, seeing his colleagues on K-Tube engaging salthi drones.

The doors slide open from the corridor and Jamie makes his way in, clearly tense and with a faraway look in his eyes. He doesn't spot what's up on the screen right away since he's headed for one of the windows, to gaze out into space, though depending on the volume, he might notice soon enough!

Azran wanders in, ducking down to fit through the puny hooman massive ship doorway, and quickly sighting down Ji….Colson. Wandering over his way with a curious twitching of his ears, "Greetings. May I enquire what you are watching?"

Jack runs up to the pair. "Hey, it's you! You know the intell feed from that comm sat we found?"

Azran turns, looking down at Jack with a curious tilt of his head, "No."

"They are playing a recording of your battle against drones… what a dumb prank!" Jizz says.

Jamie stares blankly at Jack for a second, then looks up toward the monitor. His brow narrows again, and he looks almost adorably angry. It's hard to be fearsome at 5'6" but he tries his best. "Colson, turn that shit off. People died out there," he snaps.

Jack shrugs. "I can't take responsibility for that… I'm not the one with the remote."

"That was a sick corkscrew you pulled there though…" Jizz adds.

Azran's eyes narror at Ji….Colson, and he stands up straighter, being far more intimidating than Jaime by size advantage alone, ignoring the claws sharp enough to sever a human spinal column, "Then find it…" He says low, quiet, and cold as the grave.

"Oh look at the time, I got another 3 point patrol, see ya!" Jizz says attempting to bolt off.

Azran vs Jizz Athletics opposed roll
Jizz: 11 + 4
Azran: 19 + 8

Azran catches Ji….Colson, by the throat as he tries to duck under him, his paw like lightning. He slowly pushes him back and then tilts his head up to look directly up into Azran's glaring face, "I said… Find. It….I will not tell you again…."

Jizz d20 roll: 18

"y. yes sir" Jizz says meekly.

Jamie can't help a brief glance upward. He's never seen his own ship through Kilrathi gun cam footage before, and probably never will again. The knowledge of the fact that there was a nearly dead human strapped into a cockpit feet away from that camera causes his stomach to churn, and he turns his attention back toward Colson just in time to see Azran's hand snap out to seize the other pilot. He's concerned, clearly, but also allows the tiniest hint of a smirk to cross his face after the exchange.

Azran releases JI….Colson's throat, and then backs up slightly to give him room to search, eyes unblinkingly narrowed at him the whole time.

Jizz runs to the bar, looking under the taps, no remote, the barman throws him back to the other side. He then runs to the screen and tries to turn it off manually. He is too short to reach the off button.

Jizz pathetically jumps darting his eyes at the furry behemoth and grabs a bar table and puts it under the tv.

Jamie says, "Just…. just stand on one of the… yes, you've got it."

Jizz climbs onto it to turn off the tv.

Jizz d20: 6

The table falls and Jizz instinctively grabs the panel. He is dangling, two feet off the ground holding onto the tv trying to inch towards the off switch

jizz-tv.jpg

Despite the ridiculousness of the whole situation, Jamie moves forward, arms outstretched, just in case this gets any worse and Colson starts falling in a serious way.

It's one of those awful joystick thingies. Nobody can use them to turn off tvs.

Jizz d20: 4

Azran glares piteously at Ji….Colson, as he makes a fool of himself trying to switch off a television. His ability to stifle laughter and remain menacing is a thing of beauty.

The tv mount is rated for 30 lbs. The mount can be heard creacking and screws threads popping off.

Silence Reactive: (9,29) 15

Jamie steps out of the way as the tv and the pilot come crashing down.

Jizz d20: 13

Jamie grabs Colson by the waist and gives the man a yank backward as the monitor gives way. As sparks shower from the ceiling and the whole thing collapses, Jamie lands on his ass with Colson rolling across him. He lets out a sharp grunt, curls into a ball, then starts laughing. "You asshole!" It's unclear as to who he's talking to.

Jizz lurches backwards away from Azran. His hands and feet on the floor. He then lets out a massive cry of pain.

A shard of glass penetrated his skin, not a threatening one, but enough to bloody his hand. "Your XO will hear about this!” Jizz gets up and runs away, this time out of reach of Azran.

Zorro’s probably gonna fein a coma while he's there.

Jamie slowly hauls himself to his feet, rubbing one of his shoulders. He looks sore, but otherwise fairly unharmed. "Fine. Whatever," he replies irritably to Colson. The laughter finished in a hurry! Glancing up toward Azran for a moment, he pauses, then remarks, "I don't know how a ConFleet pilot managed…. any of that."

Azran stares blankly at Ji….Colson, and his threat, and simply watches him run away like a frightened chipmunk. He then turns back to Jaime, "…Imbecile…" He says with a slowly growing smirk.

Jamie shakes his head, reaches up to rub at the back of his neck, then heads over to park himself at the bar. "Sorry," he asides to the clearly irritated bartender, whether he thinks it was his fault or not. "That's just what I need. Colson complain' to our CO about us. You're a Kilrathi and I'm from the ISS. I'm sure the Wing Commander'll get rid of us as soon as he can get a competent replacement. Well…" He pauses, and shrugs. "Me, at least. I still don't know why you're here, Azran."

Azran walks over and settles at the bar next to the tiny hooman, "You will not be punished. When questioned, I will take full responsibility." He says as he settles in place, the barstool groaning in distress. Azran pauses for a moment before glancing over, "Hmm…I thought you would have read my file by now."

Seelig walks into the bar. He sees the broken tv, the fallen bent tables and the general mess. "Faq dis!" He looks at his watch. "And my shift is over. Beer!" he points at the barman and makes a finger gun.

Seelig grabs a stout and walks up to the pilots.

Azran glances back to the approaching mechanic, and gives him a confirming nod, sliding a stool out some with his leg.

Jamie doesn't look anywhere near as uncomfortable standing near Azran as he did just a few short weeks ago. He'll pick up a tea, since the 1087th are still on standby, and looks back up at the huge cat. "You kidding?" He asides to the Kilrathi. "Any details in there are way above my pay grade. Anyway. I was about to punch him, so I'm glad you did something first."

Azran looks back at Seelig, working fingers through his platinum blond hair. "Colson decided to hang from it so he could see what happened."

"Tanks, just da man, pardon the manthropomorphism, I wanted to see." Seelig responds.

Azran shrugs slightly, "I suppose that makes sense…Defectors are likely kept…confidential." Azran says to Jaime, visibly searching for the words before turning to Seelig, "Oh? How might I assist you?"

"Don't care, not on the clock kid. Either way… that Ktube feed was a pain in the salami." Seelig says. “You see. it's pretty rare that a flight returns with more ships than it sets out wit."

Azran glances to the smashed TV and then back to Seelig, "…We were not aware." He says in a total deadpan.

"I'm all for salvaging or repurposing. But there are some glyphs on the dralthi you brought in that we can't make cocks or dollies from." Seelig says.

Grateful from the distraction and curious about the news, Jamie cocks his head toward Seelig. "Really? Which Dralthi? The one I nailed in the cockpit?" He sounds rather proud of that.

"Now my khrakra aint tea bag. But we have a much better translator right here. Instead of using the jazz ands on the confusers and having shintell say "well golly gee willigers, we'll get back to you in a month with 12 possible translations" I would rather have the real deal." Seelig says.

Azran nods, "Ahhh, I see. Yes, in the empire, translating the strange symbols the Terrans use was quite difficult. More than a few captured ships were rendered irreparable before any headway was made. I am more than happy to assist however I am able."

"You got that shot kid? 'grats it was one in a million. spent tree hours cleaning it out wit a toothbrush… gunk and shrapnel everywhere." Seelig says.

Azran chuckles slightly… It's a horrific choking growling noise, but trust me, that's how cats laugh…When they dont laugh by destroying your things….and glances back to Jaime, "Yes, that was most impressive. A clean kill, and minimal damage to the ship. And here you are, worried you will be dismissed."

Abruptly, Jamie's demeanor changes slightly. Instead of proud, he looks chastised when the other two complimented him. "Ah, yeah. Thanks," he says, quietly. He's grateful for the subject change a minute later and tilts his head curiously. "Yeah, I'm in," the blonde states, a moment later. "Sounds more interesting than sitting up here."

The bartender barks, "OUT, then, all of you, before anything ELSE breaks!"

Karen walks into the bar… she's wearing dark glasses and an especially wrinkled sweatsuit.
Karen looks around and sees the barman sweeping up broken glass as well as a bent table and a minute amount of blood on the floor. "Somehow I suspect Megan did something…" she muses and goes to sit at the bar grabbing a pink sucrose soda.

Karen finishes her drink and returns to her bunk, walking lightly to avoid the broken glass.